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Thread: Do yoiu ever get advice from people not to get your child "labeled"?

  1. #1
    redd89 is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default Do yoiu ever get advice from people not to get your child "labeled"?

    I've heard it a few times here and there, but never quite understood what people were trying to say. Can anyone explain?
    Janie

  2. #2
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    Default my MIL says it to me all the time

    and Ive learned to just ignorre it. My dd was born early, SID unfortunatly explains so much... I knew she had issues with sensory long before the doctors told me.

  3. #3
    sugarsue is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default My mom said it in the beginning

    She was very against it. I guess she's used to it now and see's how much a diagnosis and therapy has helped us. I tried to explain that my girls SID is a part of who they are right now and it helps to have knowledge.

    I think my mom was worried about lables because of the worry of being judged or held back in some way or for the self esteem of the children. I don't know exactly though.

    Susan

  4. #4
    trek is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    yes, but I think the present way of thinking, is that dx really do open doors.

  5. #5
    pepperlc is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default Well dh thinks its unnecessary - he thinks jacob is just

    going through a phase. its not the therapy thats helping, it was a phase. he's outgrowing everything.

    if you can't prove it scientifically without a doubt to him, he won't believe it.

    karen

  6. #6
    LL2 is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    Yes, I've had to struggle with this with SO the most. It's almost as though she thinks it somehow gives him new symptoms he never had by getting a diagnosis.

    The comeback (for lack of a better term) that I think really cuts to the chase for us at least is - he'll still be labeled without a diagnosis. But he'll be labeled aggressive and inattentive and inflexible and get no help learning how to deal with those issues. Yeah, it'd be great not to label him!

  7. #7
    Suzi is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default Totally agree with you on this one...

    Quote Originally Posted by LL2
    Yes, I've had to struggle with this with SO the most. It's almost as though she thinks it somehow gives him new symptoms he never had by getting a diagnosis.

    The comeback (for lack of a better term) that I think really cuts to the chase for us at least is - he'll still be labeled without a diagnosis. But he'll be labeled aggressive and inattentive and inflexible and get no help learning how to deal with those issues. Yeah, it'd be great not to label him!

    children will be "labeled" no matter what--other labels are lazy, not trying hard enough, bad, brat, stupid, retarded (yes I still have a friend who uses that word!), etc. etc. I'd much rather have the dx label and be able to educate people than everyone remain ignorant.

    The only thing I worry about having a label would be having the school system stick them with a label and then treat them a certain way-like "she's dyslexic, so she can't do x, y z." I'd want my dd to be challenged and not skate by because of her dx. I hope that makes sense.

  8. #8
    anniemc2000 is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default For my Mom

    her fear of my dds being "labeled" means she is fearful that if anyone hears about the services they get they will think less of us and of her. She likes to think they are perfect, lol. It's a very silly thought-process, but she tries to hide ALL problems, so it goes along with that way of thinking. For example, I mentioned that my 5yo dd was working with the school psychologist in a social skills group, which I was excited about. My Mom's response "Oh why do you want her to be labeled like that?".
    I just don't share a lot with her, other than the girls' successes.
    It makes no sense, but I understand what it means.
    Ann

  9. #9
    Syd is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default My dh didnt want a label on ds...m

    He expressed his concerns with a UCLA doctor and she the doctor said "call it what ever you want but we can fix it". UCLA seems to think that the dx could be lifted when he is older. If it isnt the only down side I have come up with a dx is health insurance and life insurance. He will have problems getting both with this dx when he is an adult.

    Anita

  10. #10
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    Default I've heard the same thing re: insurance (m)

    Quote Originally Posted by Anita
    He expressed his concerns with a UCLA doctor and she the doctor said "call it what ever you want but we can fix it". UCLA seems to think that the dx could be lifted when he is older. If it isnt the only down side I have come up with a dx is health insurance and life insurance. He will have problems getting both with this dx when he is an adult.

    Anita
    I heard this from someone on this board who works in the insurance area. That's one reason why I have been very careful to avoid getting a diagnosis from a doctor for as long as I can. Since ASD kids tend to not be as aware of potential physical dangers, they may be more prone to hurt themselves. So, my understanding was that the insurance companies may consider them a liability. If someone on this board has more knowledge of this than I do, please add to this. Thanks.

    (Of course if the only way to get valuable services is to get a diagnosis, then surely I would go for the diagnosis. But for now, I haven't been asked to get a diagnosis from a doctor.)

    -Carol [and Menachem b.3/28/01]

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