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Thread: Not sure how to proceed.....m

  1. #1
    trek is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default Not sure how to proceed.....m

    I posted below but no one responded. Anyway, Grant has always had a parent/teacher conference along with IEP meetings. This year no sign up sheet came home, 3 days later I emailed the teacher and his case manager. No response, than I sent a written letter, stonewalled yet again. So I emailed the assistant VP and thought we were working on a conference time. Than last week the teacher never replied to my possible dates email. Wanted to add that the conferences were in September, this is how long this has been going on, and I thought last Thursday we were moving towards a meeting with the teacher and possibly the case manager for Grant.

    On our home voice mail Friday afternoon, was a message from assistant VP. I tried to reach her yesterday, in a meeting, than this morning, in a meeting. So I emailed her. This her response...

    "Hi Mrs. ...,<o>
    </o>
    The reason I have been trying to call you is about scheduling the parent/teacher conference. (Sorry I could not call you back yesterday after 3 but I was involved with tutoring.) Since Grant has a current IEP, anything regarding his progress or instructional settings needs to be addressed in an IEP meeting. If your husband is now available, we would like to move forward with getting the IEP meeting scheduled. If he is not in town, we can still meet with you and then do a follow-up with him when he returns. Ms. Baumgartner is Grantís contact for his IEP and she will get the information to you about a date and time. Some possible times might include between 8:50 to 9:40, 12:20-1:10, 1:10 to 2:00 or after school. These are the times that Mrs. Walker has an assistant or some other type of coverage for her class. If you would like to get a few dates to us where these times would work, we can schedule something that would best fit everyone."[/font]



    Well, I do not want to have an IEP meeting at this time since I am waiting for an advocate to agree to provide services. I am still waiting for report from Dev. Pedi, and Grant has an appoitnment with a speech speicalist next month. In addition, I would like to go ahead and have him tested pscho-eduucational since it has been 3 years. the school will NOT do it until next Fall, I have asked. I have also asked to amend his IEP to put him back into Reading/Language Arts Resource, no response. But, he is doing poorly enough that they offered an afterschool tutoring program 2x a week. I have also inquired about other placements and get no repsonse. I do understand that is waht an IEP can address, but my dh does travel, I have an issue with childcare with younger ds. I am also knee deep in a fight for younger ds, and his IEP.


    He is also being teased in the classroom-his stuttering, I have asked that this be addressed and am getting pushed from one person to another.

    I do want an IEP meeting but I refuse to attend without my dh nor an advocate.

    A neighbor who is an elementary teacher at a different school in our county was livid. She always has had parent/teacher conferences with those students who have an IEP. And with ANY parent who would like one.

    School Started end of July and I have no idea how he is doing. except the report card which is cause for concern. His progress report is based on one test and he did poorly-waaaaay worse than he has ever done on either reading and math portions. Barely meeting the standard.

    Thanks for any thoughts,
    Wendy

  2. #2
    anniemc2000 is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default I would wait for the advocate

    for the IEP meeting for sure. This seems so weird, that they won't give you any updates without an IEP meeting. We have regular parent/teacher conferences like the rest of the class, and get 4 progress reports a year based on the IEP. I was just talking with a friend who is a speech therapist about another friend irl who is having a similar struggle to you with her ds's school, and she advised them to get an advocate before meeting again with the school.
    I am so sorry he's being teased in class. That simply should not be tolerated.
    I think you are wise to wait for all the reports to come in before meeting too. I don't know why they have to make this so hard for you.
    I'm sorry I missed your earlier post. We have a new addition to our family and I've not been on the boards much.
    Good luck,
    Ann

  3. #3
    JulieATL is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default Wendy, this sounds so overwhelming for you.....

    I can't believe how uncommunicative the school has been. Other than parent-teacher conferences, you should be getting regular notes home such as a communication notebook that details anything interesting, wonderful, awful or unusual that went on that day. It shouldn't take an in-person conference or a progress report to get feedback. You definitely need changes made to his IEP and I absolutely, positively encourage you to stand your ground, wait until you have all the private testing you can get (particularly the Dev Ped, as that will have more weight than a private psychologist in the school's eyes), and don't even consider going to that meeting without an advocate. There are so many in's and out's of parent rights in special education that you can't possibly get up to date on and that's what an advocate does for a living. I hate that your ds is getting teased for stuttering. It is unacceptable that it could continue for one more day. I would address that right away, even before you can get the IEP meeting together. If you need to show up to school and stand outside the principal's office, then that's what you need to do. There is no excuse for getting the run around if a child is getting teased.

    I'm sorry you're going through all of this. It's not uncommon, lots of moms of SN kids have to work so hard and bang their heads against brick walls repeatedly just to get the most basic of needs met for their kids by the school system. I do hope that you can get somewhere with the advocate's help.

    All the bes to you, stay strong,
    Julie




    Quote Originally Posted by trek
    I posted below but no one responded. Anyway, Grant has always had a parent/teacher conference along with IEP meetings. This year no sign up sheet came home, 3 days later I emailed the teacher and his case manager. No response, than I sent a written letter, stonewalled yet again. So I emailed the assistant VP and thought we were working on a conference time. Than last week the teacher never replied to my possible dates email. Wanted to add that the conferences were in September, this is how long this has been going on, and I thought last Thursday we were moving towards a meeting with the teacher and possibly the case manager for Grant.

    On our home voice mail Friday afternoon, was a message from assistant VP. I tried to reach her yesterday, in a meeting, than this morning, in a meeting. So I emailed her. This her response...

    "Hi Mrs. ...,<o>
    </o>
    The reason I have been trying to call you is about scheduling the parent/teacher conference. (Sorry I could not call you back yesterday after 3 but I was involved with tutoring.) Since Grant has a current IEP, anything regarding his progress or instructional settings needs to be addressed in an IEP meeting. If your husband is now available, we would like to move forward with getting the IEP meeting scheduled. If he is not in town, we can still meet with you and then do a follow-up with him when he returns. Ms. Baumgartner is Grantís contact for his IEP and she will get the information to you about a date and time. Some possible times might include between 8:50 to 9:40, 12:20-1:10, 1:10 to 2:00 or after school. These are the times that Mrs. Walker has an assistant or some other type of coverage for her class. If you would like to get a few dates to us where these times would work, we can schedule something that would best fit everyone."[/font]



    Well, I do not want to have an IEP meeting at this time since I am waiting for an advocate to agree to provide services. I am still waiting for report from Dev. Pedi, and Grant has an appoitnment with a speech speicalist next month. In addition, I would like to go ahead and have him tested pscho-eduucational since it has been 3 years. the school will NOT do it until next Fall, I have asked. I have also asked to amend his IEP to put him back into Reading/Language Arts Resource, no response. But, he is doing poorly enough that they offered an afterschool tutoring program 2x a week. I have also inquired about other placements and get no repsonse. I do understand that is waht an IEP can address, but my dh does travel, I have an issue with childcare with younger ds. I am also knee deep in a fight for younger ds, and his IEP.


    He is also being teased in the classroom-his stuttering, I have asked that this be addressed and am getting pushed from one person to another.

    I do want an IEP meeting but I refuse to attend without my dh nor an advocate.

    A neighbor who is an elementary teacher at a different school in our county was livid. She always has had parent/teacher conferences with those students who have an IEP. And with ANY parent who would like one.

    School Started end of July and I have no idea how he is doing. except the report card which is cause for concern. His progress report is based on one test and he did poorly-waaaaay worse than he has ever done on either reading and math portions. Barely meeting the standard.

    Thanks for any thoughts,
    Wendy

  4. #4
    trek is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    Thanks for replying. On October 11th I sent a letter to Grant's case manager. In that letter I noted the lack of communication between the school and I asked how we could remedy it. No response, except to suggest the IEP Meeting. I do have a paper copy of things, but that does not replace a conversation with a teacher. I would think the teacher would want to talk to a parent, especially where a child with special needs is floundering.

    There is a behavior check sheet that all the IEP students use, but there is very little ever written in there except if he had silent lunch, or talked when the teacher was talking. On the other hand I always write notes on Grant's homework sheets or pages if he has issues. I also will send in notes-all ignored for the most part.

    The school system seems to do this even with letters from attorneys per a friend of mine whose has a severly autisitc child in the school system.

    To make matter worse a good friend and neighbor of mine told me "off the record" that a mutual person we know and a teacher is very concerned about Grant and has tried to speak up for him to no avail.


    This is one email from Grant's case worker about the teasing. Grant's regular teacher has NOT responded, but she never does

    Wendy have you spoken to Mrs. W..about this situation? She should be able to speak to her class and help out. I am sure Mrs. W... will take care of any teasing that is occurring in her classroom. I think this would be a great place to begin and this should help the situation.


    This is from the speech therapist(she has always been an advocatefor Grant.

    When Grant gave me the note from Mom today, he mentioned that he was having a hard time with his ďvoiceĒ and that his friends are making fun of him. Grantís dysfluency has become more severe lately. Stuttering behaviors such as blocks, and repetitions are happening more often in his speech, especially when he first tries to talk. I will get with Mrs. W.... to set up a time for me to come and speak to the class about the teasing that is going on without singling Grant out. Karla Ė is any teasing also happening when he is with you? I think it may be a good idea for all of us to get together to go over some simple cueing/techniques for everyone to be using with Grant to help his dysfluency.



    <o>
    </o>

  5. #5
    danellsar is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    Wendy- First off, let me tell you that MANY schools and many districts are very reluctant to meet with parents of children who have an IEP outside of a formal IEP meeting. They feel that there is too great a chance that the parent will cry foul and say that the IEP goals are not being addressed, and will then bring a lawsuit against the district or school. There's a lot of history to back up this fear.

    That aside, I met with ALL parents for my regularly scheduled conferences, including my IEP students. Those LD students that worked with a specific special teacher, that teacher came to the meeting to share progress. So at one meeting I had the RSP teacher, at another I had the ST and the SDC teacher. Not a problem. I spoke about social issues and goals for my classroom, and they spoke about the specific academic programs they administer. At my school the ONLY reason a teacher would not conference with any parent at any time is if the parent cannot make it to the meeting. Even then, I did 2 conferences by phone/email and that worked out fine.

    It DOES sound like you have enough issues to call for another IEP review. Since you have no information except the report card on which to base his current progress in reading, you are totally justified in asking for him to be put back into the reading program. At me school, the reading specialist works with kids who are 6mos-1.5 years below grade level. More than that, and the RSP teacher works with them. Less than 6 mos discrepancy, and the classroom teacher handles it.

    The social stuff is a HUGE issue, and the classroom teacher should be on top of it. The IEP goals for my LD kids for their regular ed classroom time are almost all social. We spend a ton of time working on social skills with the whole group. It pleases me no end that my 2 LD kids, who both spend the vast majority of their day in the Resource Room, are well liked and 100% accepted in my class. I've worked very hard to teach all of my kids to be welcoming to everyone who comes into our room, since we have a number of kids who go in and out for special services.

    Please do whatever it takes to get you, your dh, and the advocate on the same page and GET THAT MEETING SCHEDULED!!!!
    Ellen

  6. #6
    pepperlc is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default This is really strange to me

    when I was teaching I always had a regular parent teacher conference with all of my students, IEPs or not. It seems like such total b-sh&t. Like they are trying to hid something. I'm sorry I didn't read everything but have you gone to the school and waited at the principals door to talk.

    There is no reason that every child in a teachers class should not have a parent teacher conference. She is creating a report card for him right? Than you have a right to know how the year is progressing so far.

    i would camp out at the school with a calendar.
    big hugs
    karen

  7. #7
    jeninnc is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    wow. I am so frustrated for you. That is not the way it is done here.


    I hate to say it but I might be inclined to wait for the advocate as well. However, do whatever you can to speed up the process!

    Hugs.

  8. #8
    trek is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    Thanks again ladies. The Principal of the school did call, but I was not home, and she is now in a meeting. She asked that I call tomorrow. I really think that some sort of meeting WITHOUT gathering 10 people on the school end is warrented first. If we do have to proceed with an IEP Meeting, it will be with an advocate,because I am not having any luck hearing back from the 2 I have emailed and called.

    I am buying a tape recorder-can you believe for 5 years I have had IEP meetings without one I plan to try it tomorrow at my younger ds IEP Meeting.

    Thanks again

  9. #9
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    Default UGH! That is soooo weird...

    Do not go to the IEP meeting without your advocate and/or your dh!
    I can't beleive you "can't" have a teacher conference. I'd be calling the school district. I always have children with IEP's in my classroom and I always have multiple conferences a year! (whenever the parent's request one)
    I am so mad for you! Let us know whathappens. I haven't had time for the boardsmuchlately,but Iwillbe looking for an update!

    Kathie
    Oh, I also always have conferences with Alex's teachers...WEIRD! and WRONG!

    Quote Originally Posted by trek
    I posted below but no one responded. Anyway, Grant has always had a parent/teacher conference along with IEP meetings. This year no sign up sheet came home, 3 days later I emailed the teacher and his case manager. No response, than I sent a written letter, stonewalled yet again. So I emailed the assistant VP and thought we were working on a conference time. Than last week the teacher never replied to my possible dates email. Wanted to add that the conferences were in September, this is how long this has been going on, and I thought last Thursday we were moving towards a meeting with the teacher and possibly the case manager for Grant.

    On our home voice mail Friday afternoon, was a message from assistant VP. I tried to reach her yesterday, in a meeting, than this morning, in a meeting. So I emailed her. This her response...

    "Hi Mrs. ...,<o>
    </o>
    The reason I have been trying to call you is about scheduling the parent/teacher conference. (Sorry I could not call you back yesterday after 3 but I was involved with tutoring.) Since Grant has a current IEP, anything regarding his progress or instructional settings needs to be addressed in an IEP meeting. If your husband is now available, we would like to move forward with getting the IEP meeting scheduled. If he is not in town, we can still meet with you and then do a follow-up with him when he returns. Ms. Baumgartner is Grantís contact for his IEP and she will get the information to you about a date and time. Some possible times might include between 8:50 to 9:40, 12:20-1:10, 1:10 to 2:00 or after school. These are the times that Mrs. Walker has an assistant or some other type of coverage for her class. If you would like to get a few dates to us where these times would work, we can schedule something that would best fit everyone."[/font]



    Well, I do not want to have an IEP meeting at this time since I am waiting for an advocate to agree to provide services. I am still waiting for report from Dev. Pedi, and Grant has an appoitnment with a speech speicalist next month. In addition, I would like to go ahead and have him tested pscho-eduucational since it has been 3 years. the school will NOT do it until next Fall, I have asked. I have also asked to amend his IEP to put him back into Reading/Language Arts Resource, no response. But, he is doing poorly enough that they offered an afterschool tutoring program 2x a week. I have also inquired about other placements and get no repsonse. I do understand that is waht an IEP can address, but my dh does travel, I have an issue with childcare with younger ds. I am also knee deep in a fight for younger ds, and his IEP.


    He is also being teased in the classroom-his stuttering, I have asked that this be addressed and am getting pushed from one person to another.

    I do want an IEP meeting but I refuse to attend without my dh nor an advocate.

    A neighbor who is an elementary teacher at a different school in our county was livid. She always has had parent/teacher conferences with those students who have an IEP. And with ANY parent who would like one.

    School Started end of July and I have no idea how he is doing. except the report card which is cause for concern. His progress report is based on one test and he did poorly-waaaaay worse than he has ever done on either reading and math portions. Barely meeting the standard.

    Thanks for any thoughts,
    Wendy

  10. #10
    angeleena is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    i just can't believe how much they suck.

    it should not be like that.

    sorry you are dealing with this.

    why can't they just have a parent/teacher conference?

    Are they afraid of doing something wrong or ????

    Hope it all gets figured out.

    -Angi

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