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Thread: having a bad day...any advice?

  1. #1
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    Default having a bad day...any advice?

    I will spare you the details but we are having a series of bad days lately. Do any of your kids take religion classes? It is a disaster here. Any advice?
    LM

  2. #2
    JulieATL is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default No religion classes here, just....m

    a shoulder for your tears. I'm sorry you're having a rough time of it. There are no easy solutions. I hope things start to get easier. Are you taking care of yourself? Sometimes I have to remind myself about how little control I really do have over ds's behavior and his choices. I work so hard throughout the day to manipulate his environment so he has the best chance of success, but it's exhausting and some days I"ve figured out, you just have to kind of surrender to the process.

    ,
    Julie

  3. #3
    zoeyz is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    My kids take religious classes. My first question for you is the timing. When are they? The timing might be difficult if class happens at a time that is already tough such as right after school if school makes for a long day, or before school or early morning weekend if your child isn't a morning person, etc. I'm finding that the teacher can make a difference, and this year both of my kids have friends in their classes. I think that's been the main reason they don't give me a hard time about it. We also carpool with someone, so it's helpful for someone else to take them to class. My kids like riding with someone else and their kid. Something else to try is an old fashioned bribe (I should call it an "incentive" ). My friend who drives my kids always has Life Saver mints with her in the car. Some days I wonder if this is the reason my son goes willingly to religious class! I'm sorry it's been difficult for you. I hope things get better.

  4. #4
    sugarsue is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default HUGS! Here's my shoulder too.

    I don't have any advice regarding the classes, but I can understand hard days! Hang in there and take lots of deep breaths! (don't eat bowls of cereal like I did today! ).

    Susan

  5. #5
    anniemc2000 is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default Sorry for the rough days...

    We have the option of home school for religious ed. In fact, the pastor encourages it- he feels the children can learn most of the lessons from their parents- not sure if that's an option for you? Sorry for the bad days- hope it gets better.
    Ann

  6. #6
    danellsar is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    My dd does. I make sure that I give her the afternoon dose of her meds right before she goes. That helps. Also, it's a very small class (sometimes just her and the minister since the other kids in the class are flaky). She goes right after school, then immediately home for dinner and homework after. It's a long day, but it works.
    Ellen

  7. #7
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    Default Thanks everyone...for the most part(sib ment)

    This time of day is particularly bad for dd.
    It is right after school. I do make sure she gets her afternoon med first.
    I think it is just too much getting home and leaving again.
    It is hard on me too running her over with a younger sibling who is unhappy to be awoken from his nap.

    It is really challenging. I could probably home school her. I think it is just another part of the grieving process of not having a neurotypical dd.
    I want her first communion to be special where she has friends who she is making first communion with etc. However, the reality is...she hates it, she has no friends in her religion class, and she is starting to get into trouble. She isn't learning to love God at all.
    LM

  8. #8
    jeninnc is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default

    no religion classes her but you have my sympathy - sometimes getting Ellie to do anything is an ordeal.

    Is there anyway you can postpone for a few months?

  9. #9
    JulieATL is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default It's unbelievable how deep and how wide these.....m

    feelings run. The grief over accepting how life is different with a SN child is never-ending as we have experiences that are so unique to our situation. That ideal image of having First Communion for your dd with fellow kids who are enjoying the experience and proud of their accomplishment is hard to let go of if it's just not turning out that way. Of course, lots of NT kids hate religion class, and are really tired after school and dread going back out, but somehow it feels different, more stressful, more meaningful when it's a SN child because you wonder how they'd be feeling if they didn't also have the extra burden of dealing with their issues and being "different."

    One thought, and this may be unrealistic for you, but when we have an activity shortly after school, I don't even let ds come home from school. He normally takes the school bus home, but I pick him up on Thursdays when he has outside OT and even though we have an hour to kill, we run errands, go to the library, drive through new neighborhoods, just to avoid going home then having to turn around and leave again. Any way you can scoop up younger sib and then get dd from school and go straight to communion class?

    Just wanted you to know I understand.

    - Julie

  10. #10
    angeleena is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default hugs!

    wish i had advice......hugs!



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