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Thread: We're Adopting again! - Remember me?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    6

    Default We're Adopting again! - Remember me?

    Hello ladies,

    I haven't been on the boards in quite some time. I was very active on the donor egg boards since 2004. I had a stroke while 2 months pregnant and suffered a m/c at 18 weeks. We were immediately blessed with an adoption miracle just 3 months after losing my precious son and brought DS home just days before Cmas in 2005.

    We just connected with another potential birthmother and the baby is due next month!!! She seems commited to placing with us and just told me to choose the baby's name. Wow!!!

    We're cautiously excited!
    Anne22
    Last edited by Anne22; 04-26-2009 at 07:04 PM. Reason: typo

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    199

    Default

    Congratulations. Hope everything runs smoothly for you, at least you don't have long to wait.

    Lilly

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
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    That's exciting Anne! Here's to a smooth match and a wonderful new baby soon Btw, this board is sloooooow but there are a few of us who keep it going, so keep us updated! Oh, do you know the sex?

    Jen

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    6

    Default It's a boy!

    We have a short wait from our match to birth, but we have been officially waiting for 1 year. The baby is due in 2 weeks!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
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    477

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    Oh my goodness--it could be any day now I will be forever grateful that our match for our daughter was as short as it was; 24 hours! I seriously do not know how people last more than a month or two. Will you have to travel? Have you told your son anything? My bio son was 5.5yo when we brought our daughter home (on New Year's Eve in 2007). I think knowing what to say/not to say to my son was among the hardest part of the process; especially the time from birth to TPR.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    Wow 24 hours! We waited just 1 month with our first adoption from the time we met DS' Bmom to his birth. I think that's a good sign in many ways. She was really commited to placing with us and took a lot of time to choose adoption.

    I am hoping that is the case this time around as well. Our PBMom says she and her boyfriend were going to keep the baby themselves but have now decided adoption is best for them. I like that she took a lot of time to come to this decision. I am in awe of her and truly grateful! I am holding my breath and in no way want to sway her decision. She tells me she is just not ready to parent. She is still in highschool. I know she could ultimately change her mind after the birth, so we are really trying to hold back our emotions until TPR, which could take up to 3 weeks! Our lawyer says not to worry too much once she signs, but of course I will!

    Our DS is 3.5. We have discussed not calling the baby his little brother until we are certain. If for some reason this falls through, I do not want him to think we gave his little brother back or something. I am very concerned about scarring him. We will tell him the baby is gonna live at our house for a while and leave it at that. Sounds crazy to write that but I really do want to protect him... and us too, if that's possible.

    She seems determined to place with us and repeatedly reassures ME, lol. She has even told us to make sure we choose his name b/c he will be our son. I was all choked up when she told me that!

  7. #7
    trek is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    Default

    Any updates?

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    Default sadly, unbelievably, she changed her mind...

    we are in shock. today is her due date too. she told me yesterday that even she is surprised that she has changed her mind. her boyfriend signed over his rights to her last week and she told us to make sure we choose a name for "our" baby. And she asked that we cut the cord at the hospital. it's amazing that she would go through all those details and change her mind immediately before the birth.

    needless to say, this is difficult for us as she repeatedly reassured us that this si what she wanted. no one could have foreseen that she herself would simply have a change of heart...not even her.

    i've left the door open just in case she changes her mind once again, but i am not counting on that. i felt there is a remote chance, if any, since she was so determined to place. she is young and still in high school and wants to hang out with her friends. i hope she knows the sacrifices she will have to make. i'm just not sure she does realize that.

    i truly care about her and the baby and wish them the very best. i hope she is capable of raising this baby and has his best interest in mind. if so, then
    i will find a way to respect her decision.

    sorry if this reply is rambling. i'm still processing my feelings. we were ready to get on a plane...

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
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    Anne,

    I am so very sorry for your loss. Please allow yourself the time you need to grieve. I cannot imagine what you are going through. I hope you find your baby soon.

    Take care,
    Jen

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
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    How heartbreaking Anne. I don't even know what to say, except that i'm sorry that you are having to go through this. I can't think of anything more heart breaking. Maybe she will change her mind, or maybe there is another baby that was meant to be yours.

    Gentle hugs,

    Lilly

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