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Thread: when is it appropriate to *fight* back? (m)

  1. #11
    sfpierce is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Default the right to APPROPRIATELY defend oneself (vent and tale)

    from physical harm is built into the LAWS of this nation. Honestly, I get a little sick to death of the idea that those laws get suspended as soon as you cross into the schoolgrounds. Indeed, there have been a few of these school shootings where it is a kid who has been picked on and bullied for YEARS on end, w/o school administration ever doing anything about it, who have finally snapped and then killed. Think about it from the kid's perspective... if I hit back, I'm suspended and my life is over but my life is over now because I can't take this any more. While fighting at school is VERY BAD and should be strongly discouraged, I do believe that the school administration should be able to dispense different justice for the aggressor and the defendor.

    Now for the story. In 8th grade, I got surrounded one day at school by 6 boys who hit me and groped me and were lifting my shirt. I didn't know their names and it was 6 on 1. The next day, I spotted one of them alone. I came up to him, literally picked him up by his shirt and slammed him into his locker and told him EXACTLY what I would do to him if he or his friends ever messed w/ me again. Next morning, I was with the Asst Principal (I was w/ him for about 5 mins every morning because I did early band at 7 am and was always a little early). He said "I heard you beat someone up yesterday. What happened." So I told him. He nodded his head and said nother further. And those boys never bothered me again.

  2. #12
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    I tell my nephews to hit back if they are bullied. I tell my DD to fight back if she is messed with. First words, then get an adult, and if those things don't work, damn straight a child has the right to defend themselves.

  3. #13
    Gayler is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Please check out PNO board about the 9th grader.

    My son had somthing happen today that was totally gross and un healthy...I wouldn't mind if he did something about it.....

    Bullying is terrible and sometimes you have to stand up for yourself......This one kid in school brought an unloaded gun to school and he did it because he was being bullied.

  4. #14
    novice5 is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
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    Quote Originally Posted by Erin M View Post
    When the bully swings first or corners the child so they cannot physically get away. Words, however awful, do not justify physical violence.
    Not that simple. What if the bully is behind a kid and is shoving a kid as they walk down a school bus aisle to get off? The kid in front is loaded dwon with school stuff and just keeps moving. All the while calling the bully kid continues the racial ephithets? And then the kid continues with the epithets and is right behind the kid as they get off the bus ?
    And the bus driver does NOTHING to stop it?

    And the kid puts down his overload of musical instrument and backpack and slams the bully to the ground?
    The kids are maybe 12-13 yrs old.
    You know what.. in a public school both kids got punished.

    Which is why I am sticking in private school. At least in ours, the bully would be punished and probably thrown out of the school, but the other kid would not. Would be counseled but not punished.


    There are too many grey areas. YOu can not just say a bullied kid has to be cornered or physcially restrained or being hurt.
    Zero tolerance should not mean zero brains but in many public school bureaucracies it does.

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