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Thread: DS missed boy scouts today, but my best friend was

  1. #11
    ybab is offline INCIIDer - A Community Creator
    Join Date
    Jan 2006


    That is unbelievably awful. I am so sorry. I'd be horribly upset if someone said that about my DS.

    I wouldn't file a complaint. I would call the guy and discuss it with him first. He may be a nice person who said something stupid, and he may be immediately apologetic. In which case, I'd be inclined to let it go with that conversation, and use it as an opportunity to share what it's like for SN kids and why his comment was not o.k.. If, on the other hand, he turns out to be a defensive *** who doesn't see anything wrong with what he said, then I'd pursue something more formal and find a new troop. Our town is very small, and I'm very likely to see the parent who ran the Scout troop in soccer, at school, etc. So I'd want to work it out in a conversation first and see if it can turn into a learning opportunity that will make him a more sensitive leader. As a former soccer coach, I know I'd want to hear first from the parent and be given an opportunity to eat crow.

    It was a stupid and insensitive thing to say, and I'm sorry - but also a bit glad that your friend was there to hear it.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2007

    Default I am the "planning" part of my DS scout den

    not formally a "den mother" but I do all the other things other than run the actual meeting. The reason I do this (and the reason the leader is the leader) is because our two sons are a handful, need extra guidence and we felt it would help the overall "spirit" of the pack.

    The leaders comment is so completely out of line, totally opposite of what the scouts are suppose to be about. I don't know what the ramifications for a formal complaint would be. What result are you hoping to achieve? Do you want him to be scout leader any more? Do you want to educate him?

    If this comment represents his overall attitude towards boys that are a challenge then he should reconsider his role as scout leader as it is not the example nor the type of "leadership" any sensible person would want to foster. I don't know what level your son is at (tiger, wolf, bear etc.) but every year there are multiple achievements that focus solely on respect and responsiblility. It sounds like you should meet with him, volunteer to lead the specific achievement that deals with respect and dedicate an entire meeting to the topic.

    Let us know how it goes.


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